


Don't Break

by Kunstpause



Series: Kinktober 2020 [16]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Blood and Injury, Blow Jobs, Canon-Typical Violence, Choking, Consensual Non-Consent, Emotional Manipulation, F/M, Female Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Named Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Scratching, Uniform Kink, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:14:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27190916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kunstpause/pseuds/Kunstpause
Summary: Sometimes he was so soft with her, Althea could almost forget what a monster Zenos truly was until he reminded her in no uncertain terms. It didn't lessen her guilt about what they were doing in the least, but Zenos might have some thoughts about that, too.
Relationships: Zenos yae Galvus/Warrior of Light
Series: Kinktober 2020 [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947166
Comments: 18
Kudos: 68





	Don't Break

**Author's Note:**

> So about that CNC tag, a word in advance: They are deliberately toeing a line here, but it is a conscious decision. Are there bad and seriously messed up life-choices? Yes. But there is no actual non-consent in this. Still, if even the allusion to it makes you feel some kind of way you might wanna back out.

_ ‘This is a rescue mission. Get in, distract, and then leave.’  _ Thea repeated those words like a mantra in her head as she snuck through the hallways, evading as many patrols as she could. While she had stolen a uniform from one of the guards outside to blend at least somewhat in, every interaction could give her away, after all. 

Part of her was seething, despite her best tries to stay calm. Althea wasn’t sure what exactly she had expected to be the outcome of her and Zenos’ little distractions. There hadn’t been any illusions from her side about where they stood. Still, when she had returned from their last little tryst, the one they had actually planned in advance, only to find the resistance’s defenses broken and one of the Scions taken prisoner, she had wanted to run her head into the next wall in anger. 

No matter how much of an unspoken set of rules she and Zenos had established for themselves, there never once had been talk about a general ceasefire. And at the end of the day, he was the Legatus of the XIIth, a strategist and military leader, as much as his single-minded obsession with their duels sometimes made Thea forget about that fact. That he would use the strategic information of knowing exactly where she would be on a specific night to organize his plans accordingly should not be a surprise. When it had been, regardless, she had only herself to blame. 

She, who had spent said night happily in his bed, marveling at his compliance to her every whim and wish. What a complete and utter fool she had made of herself. But no more. They had a plan, and Thea would see it through. They would free Krile, and she would return the favor of playing the distraction.

Althea had broken into the palace before, but this time, her goal wasn’t to reach an easily accessible balcony somewhere far away from most guards. This time, she was headed to the most secure place in the whole palace - the throne room. And she came prepared. She had memorized the layout by heart. All the little facts their spies had gained painstakingly over the last months about the patrols and the guard rotations were present in her head. 

Once she was past the hallways, getting into the actual throne room through a servant-connection turned out surprisingly simple. When she was inside, Thea realized that most of the large room was unused, lying in shadows. Zenos was there, sitting on his throne just as she had expected, looking bored out of his mind, only half-listening to whatever his military advisors kept talking about. 

She stuck to the shadows, moving silently, trying to get into a more advantageous position. None of his guards or advisors seemed to have noticed her, and Thea felt almost triumphant before she saw Zenos still for the briefest of moments. He relaxed almost instantly again, not even moving his head around to look, but she was all but certain he had noticed what the rest of his people hadn’t.

He knew she was there.

Thea cursed silently over the loss of her element of surprise before she made a decision and simply stepped out of the shadows. 

Zenos still didn’t turn toward her, but the corner of his mouth went up into a smile.

“I’m afraid I have other commitments right now,” he said smoothly while the advisors in front of him looked both confused and alarmed all of a sudden. 

“What, I go through all this trouble of breaking in here, and you don’t have time for me?” Her voice carried surprisingly loud through the large hall, and a second later, it was joined by the sounds of every guard in the room drawing their weapon.

“Oh, that was not directed at you,” Zenos said with an aside move of his hand. “I meant them,” he added, gesturing at his people. “This meeting is over.”

“Don’t bother, I’ll let you get back to your more important despotic work in a moment, I am just here for Krile,” Thea said a tad sharper. She hadn’t come here for banter after all. “Where is she?”

At her words, Zenos stood up and actually turned towards her, a knowing smile on his lips. “Who?” he asked in the most bored tone possible. “Oh, your fellow Scion… Are you really going to pretend you don’t know?” When Althea narrowed her eyes at him, he let out a chuckle. “You _ know _ she’s being held at the research facility, which is the reason why you are here, in my palace instead, making sure I’m distracted while your friends try to free her.”

At the casualness with which he spoke, her throat closed up. “How?” she got out, her voice full of surprise.

Zenos shrugged. “I am guessing my spies are better than yours,” he said, sounding bored again, but that insidious smile from earlier was still on his face, promising nothing good. “But don’t worry, I only doubled the usual guard. If they are not completely incompetent, your friends might even make it.” 

Shit. 

Everything in Althea clammed up as a sense of terror flooded her. If he spoke the truth, the Scions were bound to run into massive troubles. And even though she had complete faith in their abilities to hold their own in a fight, if they were expected… With panic rising in her, she tried to figure out her options. She could run. Try to reach them in time, but the research facility wasn’t close. It would take her some time to get there, time they might not have. Warning them through her linkpearl was out of the question as well. Like every time she set foot into an imperial fortress, it had shortened out almost immediately. But there was one other option she could think of.

“Let her go,” she demanded with a surprisingly steady voice. “Or I'll leave. For good.” There was a disbelieving scoff from someone behind Zenos, a guard shifting slightly. She could only imagine how confused each one of them most likely was at their conversation. Thea held her head high, hoping with all her might that she had not overplayed her hand. So far, his obsession with her had led to more than one very unexpected turn of events, but before this moment, she would never have thought to try and use it for something like this.

With a scoff, he simply waved her demand aside. “You think that would deter me from seeking you out on the next battlefield?”

Thea swallowed heavily, squaring her shoulders as she gave him a cold look. “No, you misunderstand. I will leave. Everything. I’ll disappear so thoroughly you will never see me again.”

Zenos narrowed his eyes, giving her a long look before he shook his head with a soft laugh.

“That would indeed be a formidable threat if you were just a little bit more convincing,” he said with an amused smile. “No, you won't leave your friends behind. That has been your problem from the day we met. You could have run at any time, but you didn’t. As much as you hate what they make you do, you could never simply leave…”

“Hells,” Thea cursed, as he called her bluff with little to no hesitation. “I should have killed you when I had the chance.” 

One of the guards, looking much braver than his companions, made a careful step towards her at these words, but stopped dead in his tracks as Zenos threw his head back, and for a moment, Thea was mesmerized by how carefree his face looked as a genuine laugh rippled through him. It was gone as soon as it had appeared, leaving behind the more calculating, sharp smile on his face.

“And yet you never truly tried,” he murmured, a shiver of excitement underlying his mocking tone. He took a step toward her, speaking quietly enough that it was for her sensitive ears only. “Not when I slept next to you and not even when you had a knife at my throat. You didn’t want to then, and you still don’t want to now.” Zenos watched her like a hawk as he added, “You will  _ never _ kill me, just as I will never kill you.”

“I guess you have your stalemate,” Thea gnarled through her teeth, fighting against the wave of despair and frustration welling up in her. What was she supposed to do now? She was running out of time, and from the way he kept calmly watching her, Zenos knew it too.

“But by all means, maybe you should go through with it,” he said mockingly. “I can even play along, so go on and threaten to leave once more. With a little more conviction, a little more passion, I might even believe you.” His taunting voice reverberated through the throne room, echoing from the walls. “And when you go, ask yourself if it is truly because you want to free your friend, or if you are using the opportunity to run away and have it look like a noble sacrifice…”

At his implication of her cowardice, Althea bristled with anger. “I’m not running away from you,” she hissed. “But if threatening to take your hunt away is the only way I can get you to let her go…”

“Of course,  _ if _ you decide to leave,” Zenos continued without even acknowledging her interruption, “well, in that case, I should probably make my way to the research facility in person, just to be certain…”

He didn’t need to say the actual words aloud for Thea to get the message loud and clear. “You utter bastard!” she sneered at him with narrowed eyes.

Unconcerned by her hostility, Zenos merely shrugged again. “If you threaten to take something from me, I will respond in kind.”

“Take something from you?” The sheer audacity behind his words made her splutter in indignation. “I’m not your gods-damned property, Zenos!”

“That is a matter of perspective,” he replied with a calculating look. “But before we get stuck on an impasse, let me suggest another exchange.”

Everything came to a halt in her, even Althea’s nearly boiling anger. He was willing to negotiate, regardless? That was not something she had expected. “Another bargain?” she asked in confusion.

“You took your time with your rescue efforts,” Zenos pointed out plainly, and Thea ground her teeth at the thought of how long it had taken them to find out where Krile was actually being held. Not to mention the time they had needed to find a way inside. “I got what I wanted, so I’d be willing to let the prisoner go,” Zenos added at that moment, making her take in a sharp gasp in surprise.

“Letting her go? Alive?” she asked, her voice full of suspicion, but he only nodded. “And what do you want for that?”

“Not much,” Zenos murmured, “or maybe everything.” His almost serene-looking smile made her uneasy as he took another step toward her. “A few hours of your time for now. I’ll let her go, and in turn, you'll stay right where you are, and we start on finishing the last bargain we made.”

Thea couldn’t quite believe her ears. “Seriously?” she breathed out in disbelief. “That is your price?” Another thing she hadn’t seen coming. Not after he had played her so thoroughly the last time. That he would have the audacity do demand this of her now left her nearly speechless. Zenos, though, seemed to think there was nothing wrong with his proposal. 

“Take it or leave it,” he said with a casual shrug before his eyes got suddenly intense and utterly focused on her again. “But know that I will find you, wherever you might run to. After I’ve taken care of that pesky resistance, of course, I doubt they’ll last long without their precious hero.”

For a moment, Thea stood simply still, unable to move or make a decision. A bargain, he called it. An exchange. When it was something far more straightforward, far more mundane. Simple blackmail. And he knew precisely that he had enough in his hands to prevent her from even considering saying no. It didn’t actually help that a part of her was already humming in excitement. No matter how angry she was at him, at herself, spending another night with him, be it training and fighting each other or giving into more carnal pleasures, seemed like an easy way to pay the price in this situation. A voice whispered softly that there was no use in feeling awful about it, not if it wasn’t even her choice to remain here. That part was only too willing to accept his terms, and Althea hated herself for just how loud and overwhelming it was. But what alternative did she have?

“Fine,” she said with a growl, and the disgust she felt at the spark of anticipation running through her lay heavily in her voice. “Have it your way. I’ll stay.”

Zenos’ reply was an utterly satisfied looking smile and nothing more before he turned around. 

“Leave us!” he sneered at the guards and the advisors that still stood at their exact same spots. “Everyone out.” Thea had a strong suspicion that most of them were probably frozen in fear before he added, “And send word that the prisoner is to be released unharmed.”

That seemed to shake the bravest among them into a semblance of action at last. “My lord,” he began hesitantly only to be cut off immediately.

“If I have to repeat myself, mark my words, you will regret it,” Zenos said, his voice dangerously low. “I need only a single one of you to relay a message after all.” For a second, Thea almost expected things to escalate when Zenos hissed, “Now leave!”

At his repeated command, every single one of the people he had addressed went into a flurry of motions, nearly scrambling over themselves in an attempt to leave as quickly as possible. As the massive doors fell shut behind the last of them, Thea couldn’t help herself but shake her head with a scoff. 

“I didn’t think blackmail was your style.”

Zenos turned around to her again, beckoning her closer. “It is not something actually needed with you,” he said with a knowing smile. “You are usually eager enough.” His eyes hadn’t left her as Thea had automatically followed his gesture and crossed the distance between them, seemingly proving his words right. “Then again, it does make some things so much easier,” he muttered as he reached for her and let his ungloved hand run through the parts of her hair she wore open, brushing over her cheek in the process. “For you mostly,” he added with a knowing look. “No need to battle your conscience when I take the choice away from you…”

The words felt like a punch to the stomach, and Althea drew in a deep breath. He always somehow managed to get under her skin. The things he said often hit too close to home, and this time, it was no exception.

“I am liking this look on you,” Zenos murmured as he drew her closer. “You, wearing the uniform of one of my loyal subjects...”

Althea shook her head with a scoff. “You just like to see someone in this uniform, who won’t listen to a single order of yours and who doesn’t shake in their boots every time you so much as look their way.”

“Not untrue,” he admitted before an unsettling smile appeared on his face. “Tell me, did you kill the previous owner of the garments?”

“I tried to knock him out,” Thea said, noticing a hint of disappointment on his face at her words, and with a raised brow, she added, “I am guessing the tumble down from the palace walls when he resisted did nothing good for him though.” She didn’t imagine the flash of delight in his eyes as he closed the distance between them.

“Remember the terms of our little agreement?” Zenos asked, lowly. “I let you do whatever you wanted to me, and in turn, you promised to return the favor.”

A small shudder went through Althea as she remembered the night not too long ago. How he had shaken and quivered underneath her, and a soft moan left her lips at the memory of her hands around his throat. “Oh, I remember,” she said with a shaky voice. “I also remember how much you seemed to like what I did.”

“Seemed to?” Zenos asked with a raised brow, and Althea swallowed before she gave him a cold look.

“One has to wonder how much of that was nothing but an act,” she said plainly, trying to sound as unaffected as possible.

Zenos stilled briefly before he shook his head with a look of genuine surprise on his face. “There was absolutely nothing that night that required me to put on an act.”

Thea narrowed her eyes at him. He sounded remarkably honest, but something didn’t sit right with her. “You are certain that it wasn’t just an elaborate way of keeping me distracted? You let me do all that just because of what exactly?”

“Because you asked, of course,” Zenos replied without a hint of hesitation. “Yet you feel betrayed somehow.”

“You used me!” Thea snapped angrily. “You distracted me so your people could…”

“And what, pray tell, was your reason to break into my palace tonight?” he interrupted her. “Are you not here to play the exact distraction you accuse me of abusing?” His hand grabbed the collar of her uniform, pulling her closer. “Did your beloved group of friends not send you here to do exactly this? Did they not even do worse?”

“Worse?” Thea asked in a raspy voice as a shudder went through her at his closeness. “How is this worse?”

“I am assuming your Scions are unaware of all the things that transpired between us,” Zenos said smoothly. “And yet they send you here to keep me busy, presumably to fight me, after you’ve lost every single duel we fought so far.” His voice had gotten dangerously low as he continued, “Tell me, just what outcome are they expecting from this? One where you miraculously suddenly triumph? Or one where you throw yourself at the butcher’s block for them in the vain hope of coming out of this alive?”

Each and every word he spoke was so sharp it hit her like needles piercing her skin. “I volunteered for this,” she protested his insinuations. “ _ I  _ came up with the plan to come here and keep you busy.”

“Hmm,” he hummed, “and how many of them tried to talk you out of that, I wonder…”

She swallowed heavily under his gaze as she realized that he had a point. There had not been a single word of disagreement from any of her friends. Everyone had readily agreed with her plan.

“As I thought,” Zenos murmured before shaking his head. “But forget about them for now. I have it on good authority that you’ll enjoy what I have planned for our little bargain as well.”

The way he forced the topic back onto something so wholly different almost gave Thea whiplash, and she blinked in confusion as she watched his eyes rake over her entire body, shining with excitement. 

“I wonder,” she asked, curiosity blooming in her, “is it the uniform I’m wearing or the fact that we are in your throne room right now that makes you look at me like that?”

With a promising smile, his fingers slipped into her hair, grabbing a handful of it before he tugged harshly, dragging her close against him. “Yes,” he whispered simply before twisting his hand and forcing her head back. With a devious spark in his eyes, he looked down at her as his lips brushed teasingly over hers. “Here is how this is going to go,” he murmured against her lips. “I am going to tear that uniform off you and turn it into shreds. Then, I am going to force you onto your knees and have you service me right here, on the throne.”

Thea swallowed harshly, straining her neck to lessen the sharp stings of pain his hand in her hair sent through her skull. How very on the nose of him, this obvious reminder that she wasn’t supposed to be here. That she was supposed to be with the resistance, fighting his claim to the very throne he intended to take her on. How arrogant of him to tell her all this with an expectant smile, seemingly certain of her reaction. And how much she hated herself for proving him right when a small shudder of anticipation ran through her.

“I might indeed enjoy that,” she admitted hoarsely.

Above her, Zenos chuckled before he briefly nipped her lip just a little tad too sharply to be entirely pleasurable. “But that is not all,” he whispered darkly. “Anything I require of you, remember?” His grip on her hair tightened enough to have her almost yell out in pain as his smile widened. “I want you to fight me, every step of the way, like the good, little freedom-fighter your people so desperately want you to be,” he added with a growl. “I don’t want the trained pet, I want the wild beast instead.” His other hand came around the collar of her uniform, grabbing it again and twisting it harshly. “Fight me, like you are fighting for your life. _Resist,”_ he said, his eyes burning into hers filled with both threats and promises alike. “If you don’t, this will end immediately.” 

For a moment, Althea was utterly frozen before she managed to find her voice again. “There is something severely wrong with you,” she muttered as she held still, trying to fight her reaction to his words.

“And yet I have you before me, trembling in anticipation,” Zenos answered with a knowing look, and Thea knew that it was useless to pretend.

“You will not stop, as long as I fight you?” she asked again, to reassure herself she had understood him, and the answering smile she got was terrifyingly sharp.

“As long as you still fight,” he repeated the words with a nod. “I will not be gentle. I will hurt you, break you down, and crush your every attempt to resist me. And I will not be swayed by your pleas or your tears.” 

Thea shuddered as his voice washed over her, and the words started to sink in. It did not surprise her at all that the look in his eyes was eager as he spoke. That he would want something like this from her. What did give her pause, though, was her own, undeniably excited reaction to his demands. The sudden yearning it sparked in her and the anticipation that she felt at the mere thought of the danger she would be putting herself in. “And the harder I fight?”

“The harsher I will respond,” he growled against her lips before, all of a sudden, his voice sounded much more measured. “If you truly want me to stop, all you have to do is give up.”

_ An out.  _

Althea blinked, for a second utterly thrown off again as she understood that through all the twisted things he had planned, he was giving her a clear out nonetheless. A way to stop him. 

“And what happens when I give up?” she asked shakily, only for his look to turn into something that looked suspiciously like pity.

“My guess?” Zenos hummed. “Disappointment.”

She scoffed softly. “How very twisted…” 

“Oh, not my disappointment,” he said, amusement back in his voice. “Yours, I assume.” Before Thea could think about his words, everything about him turned harder somehow. “But enough of these eventualities.” With a firm tug, he held her against him as his lips closed over hers in a rough kiss.

Her first instinct was to open her mouth and simply let him, only belatedly remembering that she wasn’t supposed to. Not under his rules and certainly not in her actual reality. She wasn’t supposed to want any of this. She was supposed to fight him, oppose him at every turn. A spark of anger ran through her for forgetting, and all of a sudden, it was about much more than just these new rules of him. She had forgotten before, after all. Had let herself forget all too eagerly. But no more. This time, she wouldn’t forget. And not because he demanded it, but because she herself needed it. At least that was what she told herself.

Thea twisted her head sideways, tearing her lips away from his mouth before swinging her fist at his face. Her first punch landed perfectly, and Zenos’ head snapped back as he let out a groan of pain. But his hand twisted into the collar of her uniform didn’t let up as he pulled harder, keeping her close.

“Yes,” he let out with a delighted look on his face. “Fight me. Make this all the sweeter for the both of us,” he rumbled before kissing her again, with a force that felt more akin to a punch than an act of affection. Zenos’ other hand closed around her chin, fingers pressing down hard to pry her mouth open. The moment his tongue slipped into her mouth, Thea focussed and clenched her teeth down in a painful bite. She heard him make a guttural sound before he tore his mouth away from hers, and a moment later, the world lost its focus as he struck her hard.

Pain blossomed through Althea as she nearly toppled over and only his crushing grip on her collar kept her standing upright. She tasted the sharp copper tang of blood on her tongue, snarling as she started clawing at his wrist, but he didn’t budge. Instead, he did as he had promised earlier as he reached up to the collar of her uniform with his other hand and started to rip. The fabric gave, but not without a fight. The uniforms were made of thick, dense material, woven to withstand the elements of  Ilsabard, and they didn’t tear easily. Instead, it needed several rough tugs, each of them making the fabric dig deep into Thea’s skin, causing her to cry out in pain. She hit his chest again, clawed her fingers into his arm, and even tried her best to go for his face, but each attempt was countered and swatted aside like she was a pesky fly.

“If your Scions could see you now,” Zenos said, his voice sharply cutting through the air between them. “If they could see their precious hero struggling against the inevitable, about to be brought low by their greatest enemy… You think they’d despise you for not being strong enough? Or do you think they’d pity you instead?”

At his words, he had grabbed the hem of her pants, tearing them open before his hand slid roughly inside and in between her legs, making her still for a second as she tried to fight down a moan. “They might feel sorry for you,” he said with a sardonic smile on his face before he pushed a finger inside her. “They have no idea that the mere thought of finding yourself helpless in my grasp has you dripping with need already.” The ease with which he pushed up into her wet heat only confirmed his words. “Oh, what a broken hero you are…”

With a yell, Althea twisted, swinging her arm with as much force as she could muster. Her fist connected with his jaw, throwing him off for only a short moment, but it was enough for her to get out of his grasp and bring her other arm up to fall into an attack stance. “I never asked to be anyone’s hero,” she spat before taking another swing at him. 

But Zenos recovered quickly, and despite the blood trickling down his lip, he seemed nearly unfazed as he caught her fist mid-air, his hand nearly crushing hers as he bent her wrist in a way that almost forced her to her knees.

“And yet you still insist on playing one,” he snarled. “Don’t you ever get tired of that farce?”

With another yell, Thea threw herself forward, headbutting him as hard as she could. For a moment, her vision swam. Through a fog of haziness, she could see him stagger back, and a small laugh of triumph escaped her. Still only half-seeing, she lunged at him, only to be stopped dead in her tracks by a punch to her stomach that drew all air out of her lungs. Thea doubled over, unable to dodge the next hit that sent her flying to the floor. 

Nausea went through her, and before she could try and scramble back up, she felt something heavy settle on her chest. An armored boot, pinning her effortlessly to the ground.

“I could crush the life out of you right here, just like that,” Zenos murmured, putting just enough pressure on to make her ribs protest in pain with every breath she tried to draw in. “Would you fight me until the very end? Or would you actually relish it, would you welcome death’s sweet embrace?”

The hard, metal casings on his boot dug into her flesh, the pain a dull distraction from the crushing weight on her. The corners of her vision swam, turning slowly darker as Thea felt the low hum of panic rise in her, as it got harder and harder for her to breathe. The pressure did not let up, she realized as she heaved for air and started to kick wildly at his other leg, trying to dislodge him somewhat. 

A moment later, the pressure was gone as he lifted his boot off her. “No, you don’t actually want to die, do you?” Zenos’ voice pierced through the hazy fog around her head as Thea drew in painful and desperate breaths of air. “You just enjoy the brush with death.” His voice lowered as he bent over her. "I can relate, you know?"

His hands were on her, getting rid of her boots before roughly tearing at the remaining bits of the uniform. With gritted teeth, she tried to get up, tried to swat his hands away, but he simply ignored her until he had reached his goal, and there was not a shred of clothing remaining on her body. Thea roared angrily at the thought of how easily he had made good of his promise. How little time it had taken him to have her lying naked on the gods-damn floor next to his throne. 

She pushed herself up, lunging for him, but every hit she landed seemed to hurt herself more than it did him. He had the advantage of still being fully clothed on her, as well as his height and the better angle. In her frustration, her hands tangled in his long hair, and she tore at it with all she could. His sharp hiss of pain felt almost like a balm on her bruised skin, but it didn’t last long as fingers clasped around her wrist and slammed her hand down to the stone floor with a force that was close to breaking something. She had no choice but to let go, but it didn’t stop her from trying to kick him again.

With a fluid move, Zenos shoved her legs down before he settled on top of her. Just as she was about to take another swing at his face, now that he was closer, he let go of her wrist only to wrap both his hands around her throat. 

“I wonder,” he said lightly, “Just how much is actually needed? Should I throttle you to the brink of death?” One of his hands tensed further, pressing down slowly but insistingly while his other let go, only to run his nails in sharp scratches over her skin along her collarbone. “Should I tear your skin apart until every part of you is bleeding? Or would you like me to snap your bones one by one?” Desperately, Thea’s hands clawed at his wrist, trying to get him to dislodge his grip on her as he leaned in closer, still smiling as his voice dropped to a whisper. “Just how much do you think is enough?” Zenos murmured, his lips ghosting over the red welts his fingers left behind on her skin. “How much damage do you need me to do before I leave you for your Scions to find so they will believe you a victim and not a traitor?”

Every answer Althea could give was stuck in her throat, held in check by his unrelenting hands on her. The truth was, she had no idea. And the far more important thing was, that he would have to do a lot more than he already did to make Thea herself believe it for even a second. The harder she fought, the harsher he would respond, that had been his words, and with all she had, she pushed back, bucked underneath him, trying to twist herself enough to dislodge him. Her nails dug into the soft skin on his hand until they started to draw blood. She would fight harder, harder than she had ever before in her life if that was what it took to get him to ruin her. Althea knew that nothing less would be able to shut out her guilty conscience even for a moment.

Zenos’ hold on her was unbothered, but the look on his face told her he saw every ounce of resistance in her, noticed every feeble attempt - only to ignore them all.

“Oh, but they don’t know how you flutter in anticipation when I cut off your air,” he said with a joyful expression on his face. His fingers dug into her shoulder, prodding the scar he had left when he had cut her with her own knife as he added, “How you howl in both pain and pleasure when I cut into your flesh.” 

Before Thea started to get lightheaded again from the lack of air, he let up ever so slightly, looking at her pitiful attempt to pry his hand away. His free hand slid down her body as he shifted slightly until he could grab one of her legs and spread her apart until he was settled in between them. “I think I could break every bone in your hand and still make you come on my cock at the same time,” he mused with a deceptively casual tone before sliding his fingers through her folds, and the overabundance of wetness he found made his smile widen even further. “Look at you, dripping with arousal when all I’ve done is punish you. And you hate yourself so much for it, don’t you?” Thea had fully expected him to sound mocking, cruel even, but instead, there was something akin to reverence in his voice as he leaned closer, his lips ghosting over hers. “You think yourself broken, but this doesn’t make you defective, it makes you unique.” His teeth pulled at her lip, biting down sharply until she was sure they could both taste her blood. “It makes you  _ perfection _ .”

Every part of her was in pain, yet something in his voice, in the way Zenos looked at her, made Thea forget about it all for a moment. His hand around her throat had loosened enough so she could speak, and with a gravelly voice, she got out, “Perfection? Perfect for what?”

“For being at my side,” came his answer without hesitation. When he saw her shocked expression, he let out a laugh. “Even monsters don’t want to be alone forever. You, of all people, should know that intimately.” His touch turned slightly softer. The hold he had on her was still unshakingly strong, but it was like the edge was suddenly missing, and Thea felt almost overwhelmed by the desire in her to lean into his touch instead of fighting against it. To open herself up to the possibilities his words left hanging between them. Only to feel a renewed spike of fear and misery running through her at the mere idea.

“Don’t…” she wheezed, looking at him pleadingly. “You promised me pain! You promised me suffering…”

“Oh, the irony,” Zenos almost purred at her. “After all you did,  _ all I let you do  _ the last time we met, it is the shining hero that is terrified of a gentle touch…” As if to prove his point, his hand gently drew a lock of hair out of her face, brushing over her cheek in a fluttering, light sensation. It wrecked a desperate sob from Thea’s throat.

“You promised,” she whispered, fighting against the moisture gathering in her eyes.

“I did,” Zenos agreed, “I promised you pain, violence, and humiliation  _ as long as you fight… _ ”

Mortified, Althea became aware that she had ceased all movement a while ago. That the last few minutes, she had been nothing but lying pliantly underneath him, letting him do whatever he wanted. It served to spark the anger she held against herself back into full force, at least.

“Or maybe,” she got out with a sneer, “in the end, you don’t have the stomach to do what you really want to do.” It was a desperate try to gain back control over her own emotions, to get them back on track, back into a situation where she could convince herself that she had no choice in this.

He chuckled lightly at her transparent endeavors. “Now you are just trying to goad me into hurting you more,” he said with a disapproving click of his tongue. “Have you not punished yourself enough yet? Do you truly need me to do it for you?” When Althea stubbornly refused to answer, he shook his head. “At some point, you  _ will _ have to admit to yourself what you truly want.”

“And what is that?” Althea spat, the anger burning like fire under her skin now. 

“You don’t even truly want someone to punish you,” Zenos said, looking at her with a raised eyebrow as if he was explaining the most obvious thing in the world to her. And maybe he was, but Thea was absolutely certain that she didn’t want to hear any of it. Couldn’t want to. “You don’t want to stop or be stopped, you want someone to give you permission,” he added at that moment. “Well, I am happy to oblige.”

“Permission?” Thea growled through clenched teeth. How dare he?! “You think I need your permission? _ Want  _ your permission for anything?”

Fury raged in her as Zenos laughed at her indignation. “Mine? No. You need your own,” he pointed out. “But you don’t accept that and are unwilling to give it to yourself.” 

Althea didn’t know what to respond, conflicting emotions battling inside her. Guilt at how true his words rang, disgust at herself for feeling the way she did, and the overwhelming anger for being put on the spot like this. Zenos didn’t seem to mind her sudden silence. His lips ran over her shoulder, his hair brushing softly over her skin as he left a trail of small bites behind. “I can’t give you the absolution that you seek,” he murmured against her skin. “Or the permission to allow yourself to enjoy this thing between us.” Thea let out a sharp gasp as he suddenly bit down hard on her shoulder, sending an intense bout of pain through her body. “But I can give you something else,” he rumbled, his voice full of promise. “An excuse. For as long as I force you, none of this is your fault, right?” As if to illustrate his point, his touches turned harder all of a sudden. His hand pressed down on her throat again, threatening to cut off her air entirely just before he bit her again. Thea let out a scream of pain as she felt her skin give, and he drew blood. “You better fight back in the next ten seconds, or this will be it,” he growled. “Fight! Or admit you  _ want _ to be here.” 

A shiver of terror ran down her back as everything in her went taut, and she started struggling, more desperate than she had before. Her anger and the fear rising in her dipping into reserves of strength she hadn’t even known she still possessed. With a scream and a strength that seemed even surprising to Zenos, she backhanded him across the face before twisting her body again, and this time, she managed to dislodge him. As soon as she got her upper body off the ground, she turned sharply, ramming her elbow into his stomach, and with a grunt, he let go of her before jumping to his feet. 

“Ah,” he sighed, so full of appreciation, it almost sounded indecent. “You’re indomitable if you truly want something.” 

Thea was on her feet in no time, ignoring the hot flashes of pain running through her bruised body. And just like that, they were back to being in a fully-fledged fight. She pushed back all thoughts about her state of undress as she charged at him, landing two surprisingly strong hits before he forced her to dodge out of the way. They had traded blows without weapons before, but never quite like this. Her skin felt raw. Every hit or kick she landed felt like she was hurting herself as much as she hurt him, the ornate embellishments on his clothes leaving deep scratches on her skin behind, but Thea couldn’t bring herself to care. As long as she was fighting, everything was still alright. And as long as she hurt, as long as she was bleeding, she was still alive. 

Blow by blow, she exhausted herself against his overwhelming force. No matter how often they fought, Zenos kept being mesmerizingly terrifying in battle. When she watched him fight, it was like he had found a way to wield violence like it was a form of art. And with it, he painted and carved and molded the world around them into something new. In a way, he was like that both in battle and in bed alike. For when the fighting stopped, he continued much the same way, littering her skin with intricate patterns while writing a symphony with her moans and screams alike. Each time they clashed, he took her, slowly crushing her views and beliefs until all that was left of them were the remnants of a battlefield. A canvas he made only for her, for which he handed her the brush and expected her to paint something new. 

Althea fought, and she fought, and she fought until she felt her arms shake with exhaustion, and her legs tremble more and more with every step. His next hit sent her flying to the ground. She tried to jump back up, but her body refused to listen. With a pained groan, she rolled over onto her stomach, trying to push herself back up another way, acutely aware of the sounds his footsteps made as he closed the distance between them. 

“You know what I promised you next,” he said with a low growl. As she looked up at him, she watched him unceremoniously open his pants. Even if he hadn’t been this obvious about it, Thea knew where all of this was leading up to - he had told her in clear terms before they even started after all. Ignoring the treacherous heat tingling between her legs, she looked at him defiantly.

“No!” she hissed. But her body didn’t comply with her heated denial. She was too slow to evade him. With a firm grip, he grabbed her hair again and dragged her along with him. Her hands clasped around his arm, holding on desperately to lessen the sharp pain flowing through her skull. Her skin scraped over the hard stone floor as he moved relentlessly until she found herself exactly where he had promised her she would, on the cold, hard floor directly centered in front of the throne. 

With a force that seemed irresistible, Zenos dragged her up into a kneeling position before his hand clasped around her jaw in an unshakeable grip. “Try to bite me, and I’ll rip out your tongue with my bare hands,” he growled as he pried her mouth open, and a second later, he pushed his hard cock through her lips, muffing her protesting screams. Thea gagged as he gave her no time to accommodate him, clawing desperately at his thighs, but he didn’t budge. Holding her head in an iron grip, he pushed further, cutting off her air as he slid into her throat. 

With sharp, quick thrusts and alternating deep strokes, he fucked her mouth relentlessly, only ever letting up enough to make sure Althea wouldn’t pass out from lack of air. All while she kept trying to twist out of his unshakable grip, trying to hit each part of him she could reach. When Zenos buried himself in her all the way to the hilt, she was forced to swallow around him, spluttering and fighting for breath as he came deep down her throat.

A second later, his hold on her was gone, and she collapsed down onto the floor again. Althea coughed, a boneless, heavy feeling still all around her as the blackness at the edge of her vision slowly retreated. Briefly, she panicked at the thought of her loosely hanging limbs and the realization that there wasn’t an ounce of fight left in her. She could barely move, the idea of even trying to lift her fist in a useless attempt to defend herself was utterly ridiculous by now. But something in her kept screaming at her to get up, to not even consider giving in. She had to keep fighting. Like every time she was on a battlefield, stopping wasn’t an option. Could never be an option. And especially not now, not here. Against him. 

If she would give up now, then he would...  _ He would stop hurting her. _ Probably immediately, the moment she stopped resisting. 

He would  _ stop _ . 

Zenos didn’t want her permanently harmed. He pushed her to extremes, sometimes far beyond the borders of what anyone might consider sane, but never too far. If she only gave in, he would cease. Worse, he would touch her softly again. Take care of her.  _ Gently. _ And the thought alone terrified her to no end. 

No, Thea knew she couldn’t stop. As long as she still fought him, as long as he was still forcing her, at least she knew she could still go home again. Could still somewhat look her allies in the eyes. But if she gave in…

With all she had left, Thea rose her head, grabbing his leg weakly as she tried to push herself up, ignoring the shaking in her legs. She lost her balance almost immediately, but instead of falling back to the floor, she found herself in a warm embrace, its tenderness in such a stark contrast to what happened just minutes ago, it sent her head reeling.

“You’ve fought until the end, you can stop now,” came Zenos’ voice quietly from above her, and Althea felt something in her scream in agony.

“No,” she got out in between more coughs. “I can never stop, I have to…” Her finger dug into his clothes, weakly but insistent, as she tried to see him through the tears in her eyes. “I have to prove to them I’m not weak,” she murmured. “I have to fight, so I can be who they need me to be!”

A warm hand cradled her face. The bruises on her cheeks stung under the touch, and yet Thea leaned into it with an appreciative sigh.

“You’re fighting yourself, most of all,” Zenos said softly as he lifted her up, and for a moment, the world around her shifted. Her eyes fluttered shut as he sat her down somewhere, and she felt a soft brush of lips against her own. “You are not meant for a life like this,” he whispered against her lips, “you are made for so much more.”

Althea shivered against his kiss, her lips shaking as they parted instinctively. Part of her marveled at how he could be so ruthlessly brutal in one moment and seamlessly tender the next. As if to remind her of the duality, his teeth grazed over her split lip, and a last, lonely sliver of desperation ran through her again. She had to fight this. Fight _ him _ . She was not supposed to want any of this. Wasn’t supposed to yearn and ache for everything he was offering her.  _ Fight! _ A part of her still screamed inside her mind as his hands ran down her body. Two fingers rolled a stiff nipple between them, sending a spark of heat between her legs while his other hand traced the sore and bruised skin over her ribs, prodding every now and then to cause sharp stings of pain to run through her. Althea knew she should fight, but like the other times before, she simply didn’t want to anymore.

Some of the tension in her left, only to be replaced by a surging need as Zenos pushed her legs apart and then grabbed her hips to pull her closer toward him. His lips left hers, and as Thea felt his hands run along the insides of her thighs, her eyes flew open. The sight that greeted her drew all the air from her lungs in a sharp gasp. Zenos had not just placed her anywhere, he had sat her down on the throne. His throne. Elevated, at the top of the stairs, she sat, overlooking the vast and empty throne room, and in front of her, he was kneeling between her legs, sending her a devious smile before burying his face against her folds. 

Thea couldn’t have put any more thoughts into fighting even if she had wanted to as his tongue pressed against her clit and the low hum of constant arousal that had been present in her even through all this flared up into an inferno. She wasn’t sure if she was hissing in pain or in pleasure. Her throat ached, her lungs were burning, and a low, dull hum of pain beat through her whole body in tandem with her heartbeat, but it all felt meaningless against the wet sounds his mouth made against her and the way they were echoing through the hall.

Zenos grabbed one of her thighs, lifting it easily until it rested over his shoulder, spreading her further for him as he kept sucking and licking her in wild abandon. Helplessly, she bucked against his mouth, her hands clawing into the smooth stone armrest of the throne. The tension in her snapped as he curled his tongue around her just right, and Thea came with a whimper of his name on her lips, tears of exhaustion running down her face as her body kept shaking in pleasure under his touch.

His hands wandered up her torso again, along her neck, until he clasped her face in between them once more. “This is what you are supposed to be,” Zenos rumbled in a low voice. “ _ Where _ you are supposed to be!”

His eyes were captivating, shining brightly, and full of promise. “On a throne, while looking down at you?” Thea asked breathlessly, her stomach fluttering at the way the corner of his mouth lifted.

“No one could stop you if you truly wanted it.” His voice sounded both tempting and daring at the same time. Another sharp gasp escaped her at his straight-forward answer. 

“Not even you?” she asked curiously. 

With a raised eyebrow, he looked at her. “Why would I even want to?” 

Althea felt another shiver run through her as something new reared its head in her. Something bold and hungry and slightly unsettling. But the feeling of unease shrank before the sheer excitement it brought with it as Thea considered all he had said earlier. 

“What if I want more than this?” she asked, her voice still unsteady but driven by a new-found curiosity.

“Hm, you want something bigger? Eorzea? Garlemald, perhaps?” Zenos shot her an amused look, but there was no doubt about the satisfaction that appeared in his eyes at her question as he slowly got up. Thea still felt bonelessly exhausted, unwilling to even try to move on her own as he reached for her. Just like before, he picked her up like she weighed nothing. “I could give all of them to you,” he said, sounding as casual about it, as if he were simply offering her a cup of tea before he turned them around, and a moment later he sat back on his throne, drawing her into his lap with her back against his chest. 

“You would…” Thea whispered. It was supposed to be a question, but as she spoke, she understood that it was more of a realization for her.

With an agreeing hum, Zenos let his hand wander from her stomach up to her neck, nudging her to let her head fall back and to the side and come to rest against his shoulder. The moment she bared her neck to him, his lips were on her, leaving a trail of sharp bites and teasing kisses behind as he worked his way up from her shoulder.

“With you by my side,” he murmured in between bites, “the entire world could be our hunting ground.”

His teeth pulled gently on her skin as he grabbed her hips and lifted her enough so he could position her just right, and a moment later, his cock breached her folds, and she sank down onto him with a soft groan of pleasure. His fingers found her still sensitive clit, and the pressure was almost too direct for a moment, but Thea relished in the sharp sensation that slowly mellowed under the renewed surge of desire pooling in her. When she reached for his leg, clawing into it in an attempt to hold on to something, Zenos growled deeply behind her, his grip on her becoming firmer again. “A hunting ground where I would present you with something worthy of a huntress such as yourself,” he rumbled against her skin. “Where I will build you a throne of bones and blood.”

His words seemed to crawl under her skin, setting something in her on fire, and with a shaky voice, Thea asked, “And all I’d have to do is?”

“Accept me,” Zenos growled again as he bucked up into her once with a forceful thrust. “Accept _ us _ . Accept yourself. It will set you free.” 

She couldn’t count the myriad of emotions that ran through her at that moment. All she could do was let herself fall. Let him take over completely, moving her the way he wanted to, caressing her battered skin with his hands and lips as he fucked her slowly and deeply.

“You will stay the night,” he murmured into her ear, stating it as a fact. Thea could do nothing but nod as he went on, “After this, I mean to take you once more in the private baths, and then again and again in my bedchamber, until you succumb to exhaustion. And you will let me.” His voice hitched slightly as he pushed into her deeply.

One last bit of fear welled up in Althea as she wondered if someone would deem it wise to come looking for her if she didn’t return to the resistance camp tonight. “I-” she started her weak protest, but a soft finger on her lips stopped her dead in her thoughts. 

“Shh,” Zenos hushed her, “whatever I require of you, remember?” There was no force behind his voice but a calm determination that left no room for further arguments. “And if I require you to accept a more gentle touch, you will oblige,” he added with a low hum. “Because that was the agreement  _ and _ because you so desperately want to.” His fingers moved softly against her, coaxing more and more soft moans of pleasure from her lips as he brought her closer and closer to the brink. “The next time we meet, you will have to make a decision,” Zenos said, a dark promise behind his words. “But not tonight, tonight you can be free.” 

And with the softest of touches, he pushed her over the edge, burying himself inside her to the hilt as she came around him with a sob of relief. Freedom, and pleasure, and someone to hold her, even if it was just for tonight, sounding like the sweetest promise she had ever heard. 

A moment later, he pushed up into her once more, joining her in bliss with a soft grunt of her name against her ear as he spilled himself inside her. For a while after, neither of them moved. Thea felt bonelessly exhausted, unsure if she was even capable of doing so. When she looked into the empty throne room in front of her, she wondered just what kind of picture she made. Utterly spent and naked, spread open like she was on display and speared on his still hard cock. In the back of her mind, she knew that all of this had a purpose. Had been a deliberate choice by him. He had turned her into an offering before he had offered her everything in return. And he wasn’t done yet.

Zenos shifted behind her, lifting her slowly off him before cradling her into his arms. “For the rest of the night, let me show you once more the beauty of letting yourself be who you truly are,” he murmured lowly before his lips found hers and he kissed her deeply. With a passion as if he was set on devouring her whole, his tongue pushed hotly into her mouth, setting every nerve in her pained body on fire again. And yet, there was nothing from the earlier edge and sharpness left behind, leaving her to wonder if this was indeed the taste of freedom.

**Author's Note:**

> [Come talk to me over on tumblr ^^](https://kunstpause.tumblr.com)


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